Archive for the ‘Humor’ Category

A Hello Kitty assault rifle, yes it is true.

January 18, 2008

I’m sorry, but I am compelled to share this. Over at digg there is a blurb about a Hello Kitty assault rifle. Here is the picture. Hilarious.

So you say you have a frog who rides a motorcycle, and picks winning lotto numbers?

January 14, 2008

Here is a short post. I saw this on the late night news, did a quick search, and turns out I’m only about 4 days late on this one (but you do have to admit, I am getting faster with the topical stories). So there’s this frog in Thailand who apparently likes to ride a toy motorcycle and, until recently, was picking winning lotto numbers. The numbers appear on her belly. However, for some reason, because she seems to have lost her ability to pick the winners, she has been grounded from her favorite activity. Eh? Punishing the amphibian because she ain’t producin’? That’s cold dude. She should give the finger to the man and speed off into the sunset. The story is actually pretty funny (which you can read by following the link [pist, look <– that way]).

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My open letter to McDonalds

January 13, 2008

To whom it may concern:

In reference to your recent multi-million dollar ad campaign were you showcase two young gentlemen who clearly suffer from some degenerative neurological disorder doing something that I can only assume is some form of rap on what appears to be a street corner…

Stop it.

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All right you, leave a comment or the duck gets it.

December 14, 2007

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Pretty funny I thought. I stumbled across this pic when I somehow ended up on the main page of photobucket. Although if you look at the lettering, you can tell that whoever changed the top line. Highly amusing.

But seriously, leave a comment or the duck is getting whacked!

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Bush says goodbye to Gonzales with all the sincerity one could possibly muster reading word for word.

August 28, 2007

I am absolutely astonished by what journalists have been saying about Bush’s speech yesterday commenting on Gonzales’ leaving. Practically everyone I heard characterized his speech as being punctuated with anger. Really? Was I watching and listening to the same speech they were? All I saw was the same, “Do I have to?” or “Can’t Cheney get someone to do this for me?” look that he has had for just about every speech that he has ever given. What I found most astonishing was that it was sooo painfully obvious that 1) He didn’t write the speech, 2) He in no way prepared for the speech, and 3) He was so completely disengaged that when he got to the line where he said that Gonzales’ good name was dragged through the mud, he actually had to stop when he got to the “through the”, turn to the next page, and REEEEAD the word “mud”! AAAAAAA!!!!! I think I feel blood running out of my ears. Am I the only one who saw that? Anyone? Anyone? Please! Someone say they saw it too! You should be able to find a video of his speech at http://abcnews.go.com/politics. I just can’t be the only one to have seen that.

The death of our public education system. (you have goooot to see this video)

August 27, 2007

I may be a bit late to the party on this one, but I’m sure for at least a few of you, it will be news to you too. As you may (or may not) know, the Miss Teen USA “pageant” was held over the weekend. At one point the contestants were each asked a question. The question posed to a one Miss South Carolina was why she thought 1/5 of American school kids could not find the U.S. on a map. Now, many people have made fun of her answer, as I’m sure you will. However, I would take a different position and say that her answer was probably the most correct answer any one could have possibly given. If you do nothing else, you have goooot to see this video. You won’t be sorry.

Bush countdown clock! (get one for your blog)

August 27, 2007

Arrrrrrgh! Crap on a stick. Due to the limitations of the free blog (I suspect), WP keeps stripping out the code needed to show the clock. Well, this was certainly anticlimactic. Maybe I should migrate over to blogbspot (I know it works with them). Its still cool though, so clearly you need to go here.

Confucius also says,

August 13, 2007

Do unto others before they get a chance to do it to you.

HA! I love it.

Oh, and let’s not forget my personal favorite and life’s credo, “Why do today what you can put off till tomorrow.”

Hopefully I will have a more meaningful post not in the too distant future. But then, I refer you to the aforementioned statement above.

Knut says, "Do these pants make me look fat?"

August 6, 2007

So it looks like obesity isn’t only contagious among humans. Apparently it has found a way of jumping species and has now gone after cuddly Knut! After a life of lounging around, snacking on croissants all day (his most favorite delicacy), this ~132 pound, eight month ball of fur has, well, become quite worldly without the use of a passport. Yep. This polar bear is now a porker. To add insult to injury, zoo keepers don’t know exactly how heavy he really is because the scales in his enclosure don’t go up that high. It’s actually quite common for zoo animals to get a little chubby since they don’t face the rigors of having a real job, but I guess for Knuty, the double chin can’t be ignored anymore. So just how does one get a man-killer to shed some of his offending insulation? Atkins? South Beach? No, nothing so drastic. For now, all snacks are gone, just three squares a day (as oppose to four), and a diet of porridge, meat, and cod liver oil (hmm, cod liver oil).

Did you know that back on April 19th, Knut had a death threat hurled at him? Who knew he was a bear of international intrigue? Is he a Russian dissident? Perhaps a former KGB officer? The note sent to the zoo said, “Knut is dead! Thursday noon.” The police, while not looking for anyone specific, did take the threat seriously. The security guards were increased from five to fifteen and there was even an officer hiding behind a boulder overlooking the enclosure. Soo, it wasn’t the free flow of croissants after all. By the way, has anyone seen that guy recently?